More Cliches and Why They Suck

I am guilty of cliches, like I said in Part I. I use some of these and sometimes; they can get the message across. But usually, there's a better, more powerful way to say exactly what you mean. We just get in the habit of saying the same old thing and it becomes ineffective.

• Sleepless Nights - This is a legitimate phrase that everyone says, including myself. But let's be honest here: you're almost always exaggerating. Exaggeration and hyperbole are great ways to be theatrical and dramatic sometimes, enhancing your point.. However, if you are telling the mother of a newborn baby that you've had "so many sleepless nights" since you started Chemistry class, you're not going to get much sympathy. I would use it sparingly.
  
• It's going to get better - This phrase sucks when used alone. As a dependent clause though, it can work a little better. If I say it at all, I use it in conjunction with something else: "It's going to get better; you are working on finding another job, you're taking great care of your family. You just need to spend some time by yourself right now." By itself though...not helpful.
  
• You've gotta run before you can walk - This is just illogical and ignorant. Of course you can't run before you walk. You can "hit the ground running", I suppose. So go with that cliche instead. I approve.
  
• Toe the line - Contrary to popular belief, it isn't "tow the line". Because that would make sense. Instead, toe the line means to conform and follow the rules. Be on your best behavior, basically. I think of someone tip-toeing next to a boundary, tempting the possibility of crossing it. In principle, towing the line is still a nice, trite phrase to use, but because of the confusion, I would just say something else all together.
  
• Different day, same ole shit - Different day, same ole cliche. This isn't clever or cool or edgy. For your information.
  
• You catch more flies with honey than vinegar - I would say you catch more flies with disgusting, rotting cheese but whatever. If the metaphor is supposed to be that the flies will literally get stuck in the honey though, that's not very analogous to being nice so that you get niceness in return.
 

• Straight from the horse's mouth - Well, who would believe anything a horse says?
  
• I trust them about as far as I can throw them - Obviously, you're saying that you can't physically throw a person, therefore, you don't trust the person at all. Am I to then conclude that you trust babies since you can physically lift and throw them?
  
• The exception that proves the rule - I have never liked this phrase and don't even understand how an exception can prove a rule. Seems like the very opposite to me. Even when there are exceptions, that's why they are called such--the rule applies to everything EXCEPT this one thing. It doesn't prove the rule though.
  
• It's not written in stone - Yeah, actually, nothing is anymore. At least not for official documenting purposes. I suppose this would be appropriate if you were working on the engraving of a monumental statue.
  
• You've got egg on your face - This is a lame way to say that you did something embarrassing or regretful. It's not descriptive or telling, and does a poor job of conveying the message. Also, I would love to have egg on my face because it's delicious.
  
• No bones about it - Literally, until today, I never knew the actual meaning of this phrase because I've always seen it as a play on words (with a skeleton at halloween or in a documentary about boneless people). Or maybe I have always assumed it's a play on words because it has never made sense to me. The meaning is to not hesitate or to be bold and clear about what you say or do (apparently). It's a stupid way to say that you're being forthright. No one says forthright anymore. Say that instead! That would be anti-cliche.
  
• The buck stops here - Well, what do you know: this phrase means that you are taking responsibility and not making any more excuses. Again, never knew the real meaning because people use it to be an intimidating, aggressive sentiment, like saying "I ain't takin' no more crap". In case you're wondering, it's derived from the term "pass the buck" (pass the blame) in poker and was made famous by President Truman. For sheer failure of usage and lack of clarity, I'm putting this on the list.
  
• Shoot the breeze - I say this, but it's dumb. I know, I know. It's a cool, idiomatic expression to mean "just hanging out". But really, think about it: pure dumbness. Honestly, I say it simply because it does sound cool--I think of two old men, sitting on the front porch, in their rockers, holding a glass of whiskey and reminiscing about the war.
  
  
• Shoot to Thrill - Sorry, AC/DC. This one isn't cool.
  
• It's what's on the inside that counts - Yeah, sure. Is that why you're working out so hard, watching your diet, buying really cute clothes, and wearing makeup?
  
• That's nothing to sneeze at - Am I to deduce from this that there are things worth sneezing about? In all fairness, sneeze is derived from the Old English word "fneosan", which means to sneeze or snort. Thus implying that the possible truer meaning is "nothing to snort at", which makes a little more sense. However, that's not what the phrase's wording is now, so I can't excuse it.


• I'm so hungry I could eat a horse - I have never been this hungry. I know, that's the beauty of hyperbole, but if you're going to exaggerate, how about not using a big, ole, nasty farm animal. How about a house? Thereby removing all doubt that you might be exaggerating.